Green Eyed Perception 

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Lost and Found

A child rests his head and a musician reads as a writer observes.

The love one holds within each heart is true and innocent.

Beautiful just as it is and just as it should be.

The fog begins to fade from the fields, still lingering in the trees as the sun climbs higher into the sky of soft blue.

Healing the wounds of sorrow and enlightening the hearts of pain.

I pray.

I pray for peace and I pray for hope.

A hope that not all are lost and they feel the rays of warmth from the angels holding them.

I pray that a belief has not been ruined and forgotten, but perhaps tucked away deep inside waiting for a moment when it will be found.

Lost for a moment in a search for love;

Lost for a moment in a search for life;

Lost for a moment in a search for self.

Don't Stop.

The rainbow is there, just beyond the hills glistening in the mist of the rain that replenished the worn roads of minds.

Minds that never stopped turning;

Minds that never stopped wanting;

Answers.

Answers to questions they had never asked but knew.

Answers to letters that were never received.

A life of mystery and of wonders.

Magical serenity found,

"in the strength of differences between us,

and in the comforts where we overlap."

Carte Blanche

To walk.

To walk and just be.

Beautiful - it is.

To the top I climbed,

At the top I stopped - I sat - and I stared.

Sun setting upon gracious Norwegian mountains, I watched and the radiant lights felt warm; comforting to my skin, and the air was just cool enough to keep the colourful green of the scarves wrapped tightly around my neck.

It is different traveling alone.

Independent and good.

Lonely and bad.

The Sun set. I went inside to discover.

Carte Blanche.

Struggling to understand the story, the contemporary dancing was incredible ~ the discipline of the dancers was breathtaking, but the base to the music was a repetition of heartbeats that quickly eased my own.

Then it changed. I understood the scene ~ the before and the now was beginning to make sense.

He was torn, confused, angry, frustrated....

His movements were rigid and fast, yet steady and smooth. I could feel the battle he was portraying; a battle of good and evil; love and hate; pleasure and torture.

My heart understood.

Then she came. Beautifully poised, strong, and alert.

But there were others.

Others who pulled her away from his arms every moment they embraced;

who stood in her way with each new attempt to feel her love; her connection.

Continuing on and on, my heart felt her wounds seeping deeper and deeper.

The burn down my cheek was real.

The fire I felt from the cool tears which fell from here to there was real.

I felt this story.

I lived this story.

Over and over again.

I was moved. And I was touched.

Their love was not strong enough. They didn't beat the others.

One other, instead, won her.

Her resistance was visible and you could see her pain through her eyes as she closed them and kissed him. I imagine she closed her eyes to see her true love; to distort the guilt of the physical sensation she was enjoying.

She is, after all, only human.

As is he.

As are us.

Forget Me Not

I’d like to believe I understand, the silent answers you give and the guarded responses that linger, because I too am that way.

But I don’t know you at all.

I know the words you’ll choose to type and the letters you press to form them, but somehow it all gets lost in the space between your screen and mine and I’ll never know the truth. I’ll never know the strength or the passion behind your words because I have never heard your tone. I’ll never know the sincerity of “I’m sorry” “I miss you too” or “I hope to talk soon” because I have never had your sound drift into my ears that let me know it was real.

I did once.

Long ago.

You sat across from me and asked what I was thinking and I boldly uttered, “I wish you didn’t have to go.”

Our eyes met and the silence remained and you uttered just as boldly back, “I wish I didn’t have to either.”

You spoke those words. I remember.

But now I want to forget.

9.11.10

in the life of

20 July 2010

Surrounded silently by the sound of....

one beat, a drop in the water; rippling effect of...

Life.

Happening to the world around you and leaving you still.

Motionless as the crowds crash around you in waves of insanity.

Eager, hungry, burning with a passion for success and power.

Striving for Freedom, but blurred by the green of it all,

with the chains wrapped around their wrists,

they sigh and stress waiting for the tracks to shake and the gates to open....

to head in and out, up and down, to town, to work.

Thick, hot, and heavy, the air fills their lungs....all 20 million of them.

The streets are paved with gold.....

by Gucci and Vuiiton hanging off their skin

It’s the land of opportunity....

that will make you or break you

If you can make it here, you can make it anywhere....

and if you....

....life goes on...

still.

Alive

November 15, 2009
June 14, 2010



“I’m always okay.” And sometimes we lie. Because the truth of the matter is, most of us are not even close to okay.

When we bear that grin and attempt to put the sparkle in our eyes to match our performance to our words of "I'm okay" are we lying? Are we lying because we are keeping ourselves guarded or are we just doing what we feel is best for those around us? If others can see our lies and the lack of shine in our eyes bearing not even the slightest glow as the words tumble off the tongue reciting to the world that we are okay, then why hide? If people can see the truth - WHY HIDE?

If our glass faces are seen, the question is, how dark are people to see someone they care for in pain and to walk in the opposite direction? How dark are they to take their own self into a greater importance?

This ignorance is far from blissful and beautiful but so close to the realities of our world today. Should we all act this way? We begin to question our honest beliefs and our high standards of the definition of a 'friend'. We all have been hurt, shunned, disappointed, and betrayed in some shape or form in our lives, but because of this, should we now ignore friends when they are in need? Should we say “later” when the tears are so easily seen ready to fall? Should we turn our backs just because we were turned on once before? No.

But is that normal? To stop, drop and listen when the energy pouring out of them is staggering in strength, love, and wisdom. Are these the standards some of us are meant to follow? To lift, protect, and guide? Or to turn, guard, and protect...yourself?

Who sets these standards? Who decides what defines good character? Is there one definition? To each culture, country, and individual person this understanding, this interpretation of good character will vary and be altered with each breath we take; the encounters we experience between friends, family, acquaintances; we all are different.

We all claim to be honest and truthful to those who surround us, but the fact is we change and sometimes we hide. Do we hide behind the 950 masks we have created in fear that one person may discover the truth of who we really are? Aren’t we supposed to know who we really are? Shouldn’t we be the first to discover this amazing mystery? Is that what life is? A game we are all playing against each other in an attempt to be at the top; the best; and the most successful. Or are we all running?

We run towards our goals and away from our fears and remember our worst memories and somehow block out the good times more than we should. I want to run as fast as my legs will carry me to the ends of the earth just to say I can. I want to soar to the highest clouds just to see what it looks like. I want to be all that I can possibly be.

Selfish?

I want to be understood for what I’m feeling and be understood that I am not crazy, but maybe hurt. I want, for once, someone else to drop what they’re doing regardless of how they are feeling and be there, for me, as I have been for them. Is that not the balance of a friendship? Is that not what makes people continue to be there? This is what we all long for...a simple act of comfort and concern.

There are times; moments just as these, when the emotions are high and a clear way of thinking is not possible because a fire exists burning deeply inside yearning for any and all who have caused pain to feel it too. A line up, perhaps, of all who caused agony and pain, and to reciprocate. To explain the glorious days and long nights of support were out of love and sincerity, not spite and pity. And with these calm words, I long for them to understand and to change, not who they are, but their perception of their own actions mixing with another.

But if I can't do that, even as I've just vented in my head, I want nothing more than to take their pain away and be that guiding light to show them that at the end of it all, it’s not that bad.

You are great, amazing, and beautiful.
You are trusting, calm, and sincere.
You are loving just as much as you are loved.

Feel how you feel whenever you feel it; it's called feeling alive.




~*~E.O.
~*~W.H.

Mirrored image, these eyes you've seen.
Lost once but seen again...
in between the lines once read by you,
written by another soul
expressing the loneliness felt by a heart
grieving in a loss for something that was never really there.

One heart
aching to be heard by the beat of its confidant match,
longing to play together as a major progression does
representing a sound
of pure and blissful innocence...

I know that soul, those eyes, that progression...
I remember the truth and realness of it all...
and so I wait a bit longer
until the lines I continue to read in between are no longer blurred.



26 May 2010